Tuesday, July 15, 2008


Conrad's a good boy. I'm lucky to have him.

Yesterday was a rough day ... it was really hard to get anything done, but happily, at least here at work, I did. But on the way home from work, I just wanted to cry and sob in my car. There has been a LOT of things going on lately. Some you know about, some you don't ... but it's all just sort of crashing in on me. I told Conrad last night if I had about a week to just sit at home, on vacation and sort of detox and get myself filled up, I think it would do me a world of good. But that's not ever going to happen, as long as I'm working ... because my family all lives far away and Conrad has access to some amazing trips ... so I know I'll probably never have a week to just ... BE.

But anyway- so driving home I was thinking about everything and by the time I got home, I was just in tears ... the house thing, family stuff, not feeling well, the work issue has not really gotten THAT much better ... I feel I'm in great turmoil. When I look around at other people and the things they are going through, mine seems like not all that important ... and I'm probably right. My stuff is not that big of a deal ... but gosh, I am down.

So anyway, I get home and I immediately tell Conrad what all is on my shoulders and how I feel. I'm in some kind of funk and depression for SURE ... but at least last night I got some sleep- I can feel it today ... that I got some rest. I forced myself to go to bed and I feel asleep right away. Conrad is a good person - a very good husband. I don't think I could have done better- I know I couldn't have ... we went out to dinner, got our minds off of all that's going on, he had some good advice, some good ideas, and he really cheered me up. By the time I went to bed, I honestly did feel a little better.

Today things are not weighing on me so much ... but still a little bit.

My main goal right now should be trying very hard to learn how to deal with life's little bumps a little better. I can admit I'm 100% better than I used to be, but I could still use some work.



Jess said...

I think you are already doing well dealing with this by letting it out and venting to your husband. I'm glad he's so supportive. He's lucky to have you, too.