Boys...

Well played, Alex Menchaca, well played....

You see, Conrad and I have ANOTHER mutual friend we had in high school.... his name is Alex. He was so super cute in high school- he probably still is... and he was a good friend of mine, several years older.... (I don't know why I just told you he was cute- it's not relevent, but I know Candice knows and Mikel knows- so for you girls, I threw that in)... he was also in the band, a friend of Conrad's and took private lessons from Conrad's dad (band director). So we both knew him and of course, even through Alex, our paths in high school never crossed. Alex, God bless him, is apparently a faithful reader aka "fan" of this blog and yesterday Conrad said he received an email entitled "Ham N Cheese" hmmmm... and Alex proceeded to tell Conrad all about how he understood his plight and gave him advice based off ten years of marriage. Oh ha ha ha- you silly boys... you will NEVER figure us out- not even after fifty years of marriage... but I appreciate Alex's efforts and it was well played because he was trying to help his brother out - but his brother is weak and forward me the email. WA HA HA HA HA (evil laugh).

Speaking of his brother, Conrad - another funny incident last night- it made me laugh.

When we were doing the Dallas to Houston long distance thing I noticed Conrad was a faithful subscriber to Maxim Magazine. He could hardly ever be found without one ragtag, dog-eared copy clutched in his little hands. They were stacked under his living room tables and there were so many in the bathroom, it was a firehazard. I am SERIOUS- there were at LEAST 40 of them, probably more... and I mentioned one day that I thought Maxim was stupid and one step below Playboy. Kinda like people say Hooters is one step below a strip joint, which by the way is complete PHOOEY- that place serves the nectar of the Gods... they have the most pure ranch dressing to be found on the planet... and I daresay even if they BECAME a stip joint, I would still go just to get the wings. But I digress... Maxim is smut- but Conrad doesn't read so besides his unholy fixation on the evening news, this magazine is where he gets all his information... so I never said stop reading it, I said how offensive- this magazine is trash! Where did he get that I didn't like it out of that?! Anyway- Conrad is so super sweet and so good to me, he immediately, without my knowledge canceled his subscription and did not renew it. Once I moved to Houston, I realized it wasn't coming in the mail any more. I asked about it and he said I didn't like it- so he stopped it. Well now isn't he the sweetest thing you've ever laid eyes on in your whole LIFE? If I did not love him then (which I did) I would have loved him after that.. I said PLEASE don't stop your life for me- read the magazine, it doesn't really OFFEND me I just think it's dumb and smutty- and I laugh at you behind your back when you read it- but you can keep on, it's not hurting my feelings. But he didn't renew and alas, his knowledge of every day life in America went WAAAAAAAAAY downhill... as did his knowlege on up and coming gadgets, witty little snippets on how to deal with girls or how to GET an actual girl, upcoming movies, what's good on DVD, why your girl acts like she does and also what bikinis the celebs are wearing- (with pics!) just what DOES Lindsey Lohan want in a boyfriend and how come Angelina Jolie would NEVER EVER date a married man. Such crap.

Fast forward to a few months later- Delta Airlines sent me this thing and said you have miles, but not enough to count- so be a good girl and cash these things in - here are some magazines you can get. So being an EXCELLENT wife-to-be I got Conrad Maxim and Cigar Afficiando (spelling?) and told him... I guess he forgot.

Yesterday his first Maxim arrived in the mail- and I was off doing something else. When I walked by with a mixture of fear and giddiness he said " I SWEAR I did not renew my subscription- look!" and he had a copy of Maxim in his hand- a very sweaty and messy looking Eva Menendez on the cover, but whatever..... and I said "Um- I know, I ordered it for you. Remember- with my miles".... he was so relieved he was not in trouble.

But I went back into a back room to pack up some presents and I chuckled...

These are the differences between boys and girls....

Ka