Monday, August 11, 2008


Here's some cheap entertainment ... I've been getting the Sunday paper at home because of the coupons, and Conrad does the Sodoku and crossword ... and I realized in his section of the paper, they do wedding announcements ... and Houston is a BIG city - and usually there are only 4-6 announcements per week ... so you KNOW the kind of people who put them in the paper. It is the skinny, rich girls and they CRACK ME UP ... first of all, you'd be skinny too if you had money for personal trainers and had been told since birth that food was evil ... they have to stay skinny to land these doctors and lawyers. The announcements entertain me because they are SO SILLY! All of these girls have custom dresses made, their flowers are ridiculous ... they are almost always frats and sororities involved and a lot of the men they are marrying are "consultants" which Conrad says means unemployed. I think a lot of these announcements are WAY embelished ...

I think we had a great wedding- I think it was beautiful and classy and a lot of fun. We had the best time! We still talk about it- the food was AMAZING, I was never so proud ... but if I did an announcement they way THEY do announcements and I put in all true facts it would sound the HillBilly Wedding of 2008! Wanna see? Fine - It would have looked something like this ...

Miss Karyn Elizabeth Abercrombie and Mr Conrad Michael Hopkins were united in marriage on April 26, 2008 at six o'clock in the evening at the County Line BBQ in Houston, Texas. The ceremony was officiated by Pastor Dickson Rial of Garland, Texas. Music was provided by On Deck Entertainment (Your One Stop Party Source!) and the bride's parents hosted an all you can eat BBQ buffet and keg beer reception at the same location. On Friday evening, the groom's parents hosted a rehearsal dinner at the Gleannloch Farms Community Recreation Center.

The bride is the daughter of Mr David Abercrombie and Mrs Brian Boring. She is the granddaughter of the late Mr and Mrs Earl Abercrombie of Charleston, SC and the late Mr and Mrs WR Doran of Charleston, SC. The groom is the son of Mr and Mrs Mike Hopkins of Dallas, Texas. He is the grandson of the late Mr and Mrs George Hopkins and the late Mr James McKinley and Mrs Wanda McKinley, all of Dallas, Texas.

Given in marriage by her parents and escorted by her father, the bride chose a strapless, second hand Alfredo Angelo gown purchased off of Craigslist for $100. The full A-line dress featured embrodiery and delicate pleats at the midriff. To go with her gown, the bride chose an ivory, two tiered veil purchased for a reasonable price off of Ebay. The bride chose a bouquet made of Stargazer Lillies- whose smell was so strong, it caused the groom to lean over in the middle of the ceremony and ask the bride "what's that smell?"

Attendants to the bride: Mr Mike VanStaveren of Slidell, Louisiana served as the bride's Man of Honor.

Mr John Rios, of Greenville, Texas, Texas State Trooper, served as the Best Man.

Karyn is a 1993 graduate of South Grand Prairie High School, in Grand Praire, Texas. She will continue on in her position in the Customer Service Department of _________ in Houston, Texas.

Conrad is a 1993 graduate of South Grand Prairie High School in Grand Prairie Texas and a 1998 graduate of Texas A&M, where he was a member of the 12th Man. WHOOP! He will continue on as a biomedical equipment salesman for ________ in Houston, Texas.

The couple has choosen to delay the honeymoon, instead using the free trip to Marabella Spain and Morocco- Conrad earned, until October, where they will enjoy a romantic trip with all of Conrad's coworkers. The couple will reside in Houston, Texas once they find that perfect foreclosure!

See? A perfectly good wedding looks COMPLETELY redneck! I absolutely ADORE the Sunday paper!



DeeDee said...

ok, that was really funny! Thanks for the laugh Karyn!