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Monday, August 3, 2009

Overwhelmed

I am in one of those weird moods again - happens a few times a year, depending on what's going on, but I'm feeling overwhelmed again ... in all aspects of my life. At least though now, it seems, it's a "life" thing- not something being caused by other people.

Work is super busy - and I feel like I'm making great strides career-wise ... I feel like the last 8 weeks have been the hardest and the most challenging, the most frustrating, the most fun, the most rewarding. It's funny how it can be all those things. I feel like I made more of a difference there in two months than I have in two years ... and you know what? I'm super tired. It's like hitting a wall ... like I need four straight days off in bed just to sort of recover. Rewarding and exhausting ...

Home ... a cross between busy and lazy. I have no energy for things - mostly I guess due to the work thing - but we got a LOT done here this weekend - and in order for it all to be pulled together, we have a lot more little tiny things to do. I think we ARE at a point now to either put it up for sale or rent it out- and move on to the next house - which would be "our house" .... you know, our first house together-since Conrad had this one before me. An exciting adventure and also an exhausting never-ending process, it seems.

Gotta go back to school. If I'm going to keep that career, that work life moving forward, I need to finish school. The prospect is daunting to say the least. I struggle with that- I should have finished at 22 like everyone else, but if I had- I woudn't be who I am and where I am today ... it's a hard thing to grasp ...

So I don't know it's all so overwhelming. I feel like laughing or crying all at once. I feel like I need a spa day or a day in bed or a day on the beach or ... something ...

I hope I figure it out soon.

Kah

3 comments:

lori.ayork said...

HA! Tell me about it....22 days and my life changes FOREVER in ways I never thought it would! Hey-that will be a perfect excuse for you to get away!

Jess said...

You will figure it out, eventually. Really!

Grace Matthews said...

I feel like that at least one a week. I waited to finish college too and I totally get what your saying. It's hard to know if it was a good choice or bad. It'll all work out though...regardless.