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Friday, June 4, 2010

Karyn & Conrad's White Trash Memorial Day

Last Friday the HOA opened up the offices so the residents could secure their pool passes for the summer. Conrad and I parked outside the office and watched all manner of trashy people march in and out. I can't figure out where they live- I think in the back of the subdivision cause TRUST ME, if I saw these peeps on a daily basis I would be OUT. Most of them even wore their BATHING SUITS down to get their pool passes. What did it for me was seeing a mom and her 14 year old HEAVILY TATTOOED daughter walk by. The daughter was BARELY in a suit, with about a foot and a half wings tattooed on her back. Conrad was inside and heard the mom arguing. Apparently they are not current on their HOA dues and could not get a pass. The mom reasoned, "Hey - I'm not going to be coming down here to the pool, SHE IS" .... and that right there cemented my decision that I would not be spending any time with these unsavories this summer. Melanoma will have to wait!

The next morning I came up with one of my more brilliant ideas. No reason the Abercrombie- Hopkins house can't be something of a resort in itself, yeah? So I took myself off to Target with my $25 gift card that I earned for Perfect Attendance at work in 2009 - that's RIGHT - can I get a "what what" ? ... and I purchased us the finest 69 inch, blow up pool $25 can buy. That's right baby - Conrad hooked it up to my car cigarette lighter and we blew this bad boy of paradise UP. Right there in the driveway ...

That's RIGHT! We're kicking it WESTSIDE - check this out HOMIES of the neighborhood- I'll not be wallowing in YOUR juices!

30 minutes later, we have our own MTV Spring Break! Check out the bountiful colors. It's deep enough to drown a cat!
After proudly displaying my wares to the neighbors- I dragged it into the backyard cause while I don't mind showing off, I'm not trying to get shot up on the block right in my own front yard. So I drug it out back and pulled out the hose - I know. THAT'S CLASSY ...   It took about 10 minutes to fill up -long enough to run in and get my cammo hat and my suit on. I pulled out my floaty from a few years back - and threw that in there - and it was like being back in the Dominican, minus the fried dog and the people chasing you down on the beach.

Another weekend has come - and I am already excited about being back out there tomorrow and Sunday.

All I need is my Mountain Dew and my library books - I know, Mom and Dad, y'all are so proud. I'm thinking about taking real good care of this - and bringing it to the house we build next year. I'm pretty sure our new neighbors are going to be pretty jealous of our style.














KAH

11 comments:

kelley said...

You should've told me you were THAT hard up for a pool -- you could've used my pool tag! We're going tonight if you wanna come.

KrysTros said...

LOL Love it! By the way, does Wal Mart still have those pools in stock? I'll put it right next to the slip and slide I bought for my nephew a few years back......

The Tomball Three said...

This one came from Target.$24.99!

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Lori York said...

Why would you drown a cat??????

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智宜 said...

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林志宏 said...

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