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Monday, February 14, 2011

ANTI

Yes - I am ANTI-Valentine's Day. I think I post this every year. I love Conrad EVERY DAY why should it just be celebrated on Valentine's Day? It's not fair for many reasons.

Reason 1  - Conrad can go to the store and buy me roses, I'd be thrilled. If he brought home a box of Russell Stover's candy I would shut up for a week. If he took me to a nice dinner I'd do naked jumping jacks. Men? They don't want anything to do with it. If I came home with a bunch of flowers he would look at me blankly. Ok, so if we make this fair and he spends $20 on me and I'm over the moon, then what can I get for him for $20? A belt? A bag of socks? I mean it SUCKS. The next thing I know I'm selling blood and plasma to get money to buy a Festina watch for stupid Valentine's Day. No. I have better things to do with my time.

Reason 2- I don't even understand Valentine's Day. It's MEAN. I work in an office. If you are single, you watch people get cool stuff all day long. If you're dating, you spend all day WONDERING if you'll get anything cool. If you do, OMG, he loves me. If you don't, he obviously doesn't care a whit for me. WE ARE BREAKING UP. If you're married, you spend all day apologizing to the dating and single girls because you got something. It's ridiculous. It's such a high tension day in an office.

So no, we don't celebrate it. Conrad and I had our first date on December 31 and Valentine's Day came up quick and I told him then, I think it's dumb and pressure filled and I don't want anything to do with it. He spent two years questioning me. Looking for hidden meanings in my words. Giving me weird looks when he thought I wasn't looking, dropping hints about the upcoming day and the finally saying are you serious and am I going to get in trouble? I think after 5 years, he's finally convinced.

We wake up, I tell him Happy Valentine's Day. That's it. I cook at home - I'm not going out to spend a ridiculous amount of money for a set menu. If I'm going to pay $100 for dinner, you better give me more than two dessert choices. The whole thing is a scam.

SO - I know it sounds bitter and ugly and mean, but I just don't like it. I will be so glad when it's over. The pink, red and white everywhere, especially on all the blogs are making me sick. Come on Feb 15th!

and yes, Conrad DOES feel like the luckiest husband alive!

Kah

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